Approaching Humanity available on Amazon

I Love Her More

In March I will be releasing the first half of my seventh poetry book titled META-  this is a poem titled "I Love Her More" and it's about how loving someone can be more important than someone who is in love.

I know you love her but I loved her first
I've been here for better or for worse
I know you're here now but before then
She is my family,  she is my friend
I'll be here before and I'll be here after you
I'll be here if you marry or say "I'm through"

I love her more
I loved her before
I loved her before you
I'll love her if you say "I'm through"

I was there when she took her first breath
I was there when she took her first steps
I still remember the one who was before you
The one who was in love but proved untrue
I'll be here before and I'll be here after you
I'll be here if you marry or say "I'm through"

I love her more
I loved her before
I loved her before you
I'll love her if you say "I'm through"

She's yours now but still in my heart
I was here for her in light and dark
Just know I've been here since day one
I will remain should you ever run
You may be in love but I love her
I love both the heart and character

I love her more
I loved her before
I loved her before you
I'll love her if you say "I'm through"

I love her more
I love her more

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Thoughts

This month I am releasing Re:GeNeSiS which is a collection of my first three poetry books to commemorate five years since I published my first poetry book.

This poem is titled "Thoughts" it is my first published poem. I wrote it when I was 15 and it was published when I was 16. The original version appeared in my second book Shadows & Sunshine and was rewritten for my third book Awakening with the Sea.

Do you ever think
That nothing is good, you're a missing link
That you are too skinny or wide
Have you ever thought of suicide
Do you feel like an oyster with no pearl
Do you feel like the only boy or girl
Is this what you think

Do you feel that nothing is fine
That it will never be your time to shine
Do you feel like a nobody
Looking inside to be a somebody
Do you feel like you're on the outside looking in
Like a loser that will never win
Is this what you think

Is this how you feel
Thinking that this isn't real
Hoping it will be the end
But you will always have a friend
To let you know you are not alone
To put you in a positive tone
This is how you should feel

Do you feel alone
Though the good in you has now grown
To know that you found your way
To know that you will change today
Now you can say "Hello world"
Because you are not the only boy or girl
Now you're not alone

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Lost my Innocence

Here's a poem from Awakening with the Sea that will be in Re:GeNeSiS

Im coming home late one night
I see a shadowy figure by my car's side
She said "I don't mean to give you fright"
"For the right price you can have the night of your life"
I asked her why she took this road
Why was this the life she chose

She told me

I lost my innocence a long time ago
The girl I was, she is no more
How can you save me if I can't save myself
I dont think you can save me from my hell

I go to the closest open store
The owner said "Why were you near that whore?"
He told me of her "exciting nights"
How she has ruined many wives lives
I asked him why she took this road
If she could put this life to a close

He told me

She lost her innocence a long time ago
Who she was, is no more
Why save her, she won't save herself
She knows her life is now a living hell

I go to her wanting to help her out
I said she should not always feel down
I looked at her and said help me help you
That it is time she start new
It is time for her to take another road
Now it is time for this life to close

She looked at me

I lost my innocence a long time ago
Who I am, I want her to be no more
I wish there was a way to save myself
Because I'm tired of living in this hell

I've seen her turn her life around
To see the evils in her life are now out
Seeing she is now sober and clean
She now looks at her past as a fiend
She is no longer on the corner at night
Now living a much better life

She told me

When I lost my innocence a long time ago
I thought the good inside me was no more
You saved me when I couldn't save myself
Thank you for removing me from my hell

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The warrior

In honor of Re:GeNeSiS coming next month im posting poems from my older books. This poem is titled "The Warrior" it originally appeared in AWAKENING WITH THE SEA and later appeared in MORE THAN A MILLION WORDS

You say it's time I give in
But I know im in a fight im destined to win
You say im not ready to fight
But ill sacrifice anything, even my life
Telling me I'll never reach the top
But the warrior in me will never give up
Talk is over it is time we fight
Because this war starts and it ends TONIGHT

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A Much needed book update

It's been a while since I've posted a book update and right now I'm in MAJOR NEED of posting one. So here's everything so far...................

Approaching Humanity is currently selling well!!! Thanks to everyone who has bought it and special thanks to Mary, Criss, and Haley for being a part of what I feel is my greatest work to date!

Re:GeNeSis this is a collection book I'm releasing in the fall. It is my first three poetry books packaged as one to celebrate five years since the release of Notebook of the Mind: The Prelude

ANNOUNCED PROJECTS!!!!!!!

Lithia: Story of Eileen this is not my project, this is the first of a two novel set I'm editing for Haley Johnson. She appeared in More than a Million Words as well as Burning Thoughts and Flooding Ideas I'm only confirming my status as editor for this project, anything else you want to know ask Haley

Meta- This is the title for what will be my seventh poetry book. This book is different from all of my previous poetry books. For starters I'm sharing a different central message in this book. Usually my poetry books have the message that you are never alone in what you go through. The message in this book is that EVERY decision we make has a good AND a bad reaction. It's also different because it's not being released all at once. Fisrt half coming in Feb/March as e-book, second half coming Sept/Oct with a COMPLETE print book coming November

Open Realms this is a short story anthology featuring myself and other authors. Unlike previous anthologies this one is ONLY short stories. Due to what I'm about to put as well as lack of funds to promote it, it will be out late next year. If you write short stories and want to be in it let me know
AND FINALLY.................................................
While writing short stories to put in Open Realms I started writing a story that I intended to use as a promo for the book. However, when I was overlooking it I felt I left out key points in the story, so I added more. After weeks of writing it I'm at 50+ pages and STILL working on it. This story will be titled Three Crowns and it serves as my FIRST NOVELLA. This project will be released along with five short stories of mine Feb/March 2014!
So here's the plans

Approaching Humanity out now (e-book in the works)
Re:GeNeSiS (repackage of first three poetry books) coming Oct/Nov. this yearLithia: Story of Eileen (Book One) (Novel by Haley Johnson, edited by me) Late this year/early net year
Three Crowns and other Short Stories (Novella +short stories) Early 2014
Meta- (Seventh poetry book) released periodically throughout 2014
Open Realms (Short story anthology) 2nd half 2014

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Approaching Humanity

Return

This is a short story I wrote for Wretched Scars a book of short stories and poems I cowrote with Ray Labuen

 

William Gordon always said he would return to his hometown once he retired. What he didn’t think about was how he’d be forced into early retirement. William had an accident at work that made his return to his hometown occur twenty years earlier than he expected. William left his hometown immediately after high school and only came back when his mother died ten years ago. William is now moving into the house his mother left him in her will. Once moved in though, William remembered why he left his hometown in the first place.

            William left in the first place because he never felt he belonged in a small town. He wasn’t like anyone else and it made him an easy target by his former classmates and the people of the town. William started having flashbacks about his teenage years. After only being in town for a week, William was already losing sleep to the flashbacks. He would wake up after remembering being thrown in a dumpster when the trucks were getting ready to pick them up, or the time three of his classmates decided to beat him up, the teacher was the parent to one of the guys that beat William up so this made it difficult for William o go to anyone. After weeks of nightmares from his earlier years in town William decides to find only person he ever considered a true friend to make his return more enjoyable.

            Marissa Draiman was William’s only friend growing up in town. She was also frowned upon by classmates and the locals in town. However, unlike William, Marissa had to stay in town after high school to help take care of her aunt. Marissa’s aunt was her guardian because Marissa’s parents died when she was four and her aunt was the only one who would take her in. Shortly after William left town, Marissa’s aunt finally succumbed to her medical conditions and died. After being treated like an outcast her whole life and the only people close to her no longer in her life. Marissa was gradually losing her sanity.

            The last time William was in town, he did not get to see her because he was informed she was sent to an asylum after her aunt died. She was deemed unfit to live amongst other people. William found out this time around she was back in her old house and he wanted to see the one friend he did have when he was growing up. He knocked on the door to what looked like an abandoned house to find her in horrible condition. Marissa had shaved her head because she was pulling her hair out while in the asylum, she also had a rope mark around her neck from where she tried to commit suicide when she left the asylum. It was obvious to William that Marissa was mentally broken and as her only friend he wanted to help her. He also felt this was needed for his own sake to prevent him from having the flashbacks he had been having lately.

            After talking to Marissa for an hour he was starting to feel sympathy for her ending up in an asylum, he also felt guilt because he felt that he was partially responsible for her ending up there.  William was also slightly confused, after every few sentences, Marissa would mumble the words “I didn’t kill me” and when William would ask Marissa to repeat herself, she’d simply say nothing. Despite Marissa being mentally broken, William felt he needed to be with his friend, especially since he wasn’t around after he graduated high school.

            Even though William wanted to comfort his friend, Marissa would only talk about her time in the asylum. He wanted her to talk about other topics, especially since Marissa speaking of the asylum was only making William’s flashbacks from high school worse. After hearing her talk of the asylum for three hours, Marissa passed out. William was on his way out the door when he saw a newspaper, he couldn’t believe what he was looking at. The paper was opened to Marissa’s obituary, according to the article, she committed suicide in the asylum over a year ago. He turned around, Marissa was floating in the air, and she yelled “I DID NOT KILL ME!” and disappeared. William took the paper and any other evidence and went back to his house.

            After seeing why Marissa’s house was abandoned, William wondered to himself how exactly did he see her and was having a conversation with her without noticing the obituary. However, he decided he wanted to know why she kept saying “I didn’t kill me.” He went to the house of one of the doctors at the asylum, the doctor let him in and they talked for an hour. He found out Marissa’s suicide was actually a cover-up by the doctor. He gave Marissa the wrong medication, which killed her instantly, the doctor, made it look like a suicide and knew no one, would look into it. A month after Marissa’s death, the doctor stepped down and he admits to William this was the first time he told the truth about Marissa. William looked at the doctor and forgave him for the incident but he wanted the doctor to admit the truth to the asylum.

            On his way out, he saw a newspaper, this one was flipped to the doctor’s obituary. The doctor killed himself leaving a note saying he did something unforgiveable. Nothing else was on the note other than “I’m sorry”. William went to the cemetery where Marissa was buried and looked at the grave. He simply said he would find a way to prove her death was an accident by another person. After he said those words he heard Marissa’s voice say “Thank you!” He turned around but he did not see his friend. He saw a newly dug grave and walked to it.

            William could not believe his eyes, he was staring at his own grave, and he realized he saw Marissa and the doctor because he himself was also dead. Then William remembered, the accident at work did not put him in retirement, the accident killed him. He remembered before dying, he said he would not leave the earth until he could prove his best friend did not kill herself. The flashbacks were occurring but they were not his memories, they were Marissa’s memories. He was remembering her pain and torture as a way to motivate him to find out the truth about his friend.

            After finding out the truth about Marissa’s death and the truth to the doctor’s death, the information appeared on the news shortly after. As William saw the truth unravel about his friend, an angel appeared before him. The angel looked at him and told him it was time for him to come home. William reached out to the angel and he went home.